I love my best friend, but...?

Some days are better than others, but today was pretty rough emotionally for me. When my best friend visited the college last November, she was so excited to see me. She ran to me immediately and gave me the biggest hug I'd ever expect. I stayed the entire night, hanging out with her and my other friends. I left that night and we were texting each other up until 3 AM when I was just lying in bed. We both said ';I love you'; that night. It felt good. Because I do love her. At that point, I only loved her as a friend, but then I couldn't stop thinking about her, and I was questioning why. Eventually I came to terms that I was starting to have feelings for my best friend. We talk on the phone a decent amount and text almost every minute of the day it seems. About everything, too. I'll even get one that looks like ';sdfghjkl'; and I know that she's thinking of me.





One day about 5 months later, I built up the courage to tell her that I noticed I was starting to have feelings for her (although they really started back in November.. I just didn't want to come across as a creep).. So I was very subtle and at first, she said, ';We live in different states, dude';... Later she told me that she didn't want to ruin what we had and that she just wanted to remain friends. I was SO SURE that she liked me, too. I was crushed and still am. I can still function normally as her friend, although it was hard at first, but I just had to put my feelings aside and remain the friend that she said she loved in the first place. But I have my days where I'm feeling a little more bummed out than usual, especially when she tells me about her ex boyfriend who doesn't care about her at all. In fact, he ditches her. He lost her digital camera recently and she told me that he always does things like this - he keeps something of hers or procrastinates coming to get something from her house so that he has a way to hang on to her. She says she's still in love with him, but couldn't ever look at him the same way again. That it's going to take a long time to get over him because she thought he was the one. He always makes her cry, though, and I can't tell you how many times she's called me like that, and I've stayed on the phone for hours just letting her vent.





I just wish she loved me like I love her. I think about her day and night. It doesn't help when she texts before she goes to sleep and when I wake up to a text, as well. It's too much for me to handle emotionally but I don't want it to stop because I cherish how much we talk. She's very special to me. She called me crying when she received her 21st bday gift in the mail and said it was the nicest thing anyone had ever done for her.





I really wish that I never liked her like this in the first place. People say it's quite easy to fall in love with your best friend. I just wish that she was the one to fall for me. Maybe then there would have been a chance. =/I love my best friend, but...?
Make yourself a little less available, as much as you love her. Stay busy with school or other friends or a hobby or a job, and she will be missing you, I promise, and feeling a bit jealous of what's taking your time.


However, you can't make someone feel anything. This is a simple fact of life----sometimes we love somebody more than she/he loves us. Your feelings will change with time.


Just be grateful that she is your best friend and that you mean enough to her for her to text you every morning and night. This is more than many people can say about the person they have unrequited love for.I love my best friend, but...?
I hope you can try to make things work. Maybe a long-distance relationship or something both you love each other I can tell....Maybe she doesnt want to have a relationship like that for the fear of missing you because your so far. Maybe she doesnt want to have to think of you so far......good luck.
Think of it this way. What if you guys did go out? and then broke up? would you rather have her as a girl you saw everyday and wouldn't talk to for the awkwardness? Or the girl you see everyday who you can run up to and surprise her like u did for her birthday?


just think of the brighter sides =]